Okay the last days i watched a lot of tutorials about drawing in a rather realistic style. and i decided on taking some elements into my own drawing style. so yeah... here are the first few attempts of combining them.
.</div></div>

yeah. and i plan on going to a tattoo-studio next week. i want to get a tattoo right after the vacation in Tunisia.
FUCK YEAH. CURSED SEAL I COME AND GET YOU!

I shouldn't sit here on LJ and write Journals... BUT DAMN I'M SO FRUSTRATED
There are still so many pics i promised i'd draw... and ALL OF THESE SUCKERS are like 'HURHUR WE HATE YOU CUZ U'RE A L0SER' Okay... its partially my fault. I told ppl to prompt me whatever they wanted. lol i should've seen that there will be threesomes and more. So yeah... i'll try it anyway. But before that i have to finish an arttrade which is like... 2 months old.

Guess what? it hates me as well.
GRAAAAH SUCKER. 
But i keep on failing so hardcore it isn't even funny anymore :(


( Wanna see? )( Wanna see? )( Wanna see? )

So i thought i should make another journal. its rather empty here after all. I have to admit.. other sites keep me kind of distracted from here. I'll list them here, since most of the ppl ignore my Journal anyway it's okay to put some links up for myself *snickers*


Lets see.. the Page taking most of my Time should be Eranya. Its a German(!) LOTGD (Lord of the Green Dragon) site, its a browser game. I roleplay there mostof the time. its fun. so if you're german you should definitely try it out! at least if you like rp. if not it isn't that good of a choice i guess :) My Characters are 'Devan' , 'Cifer' and 'Phintia'

Besides Eranya there is Y!Gallery. Like you can guess by the name its a Yaoi-Community for Writers & Artists. I really like hanging out there. The people are really nice mostly. Besides that, there are lots of Submissions with Buttsmecks and hot 'n steamy guys. *snickers*

Then there is Aramii. It's still in Beta but a really great Pet-Site. You can adventure with your ami, taking quests and breed them. There aren't any games like on  "Neopets", "Subeta" and such but they are way more pretty to look at. and its really interesting to breed your own amis with new markings and colors. My name there is 'vege'.

Last but not least is Kwick a german(!) site for chatting and such. I have to admit i just hang out there, cuz some ppl i like are registred and i want to hold contact. So i'm online there daily talking with several ppl in the evening. If you're german and we know each other, you can ask for my name there. i won't post it here in my journal though.

mh.. thats it for today.
tomorrow i'll post something different i think :D

LOL i thought i should update my Journal. The last entries are all emo and shit :B

uhm... i've got nothing to say though.
oh well....

WHITE CHOCOLATE FOR THE WIN
AND BUTTSMECKS IS HAWT
EXSPECIALLY IF ITS SASUNARUSASU

AND ITS EVEN MORE WIN IF ITS SASUNARUSASU WITH WHITE CHOCOLATE ON TOP

Hey there again.
Its kind of funny... al the years i was able to be all happy despite feeling mostly like shit. and now i... just can't get out of my depression at all. sure  irl noone notices that i'm down. i guess thats good. it wouldn't help at all to tak with my mum or with my sis about my problems anyway. in the end i'll feel all the same, but my mom will get upset.

I would've never thought that... but i'm actually really glad that i never made some 'advertising' of my lj here. 
it makes me really feel better to write some things down so i'm able to sort things in my head.. and yeah think them over. and since there aren't much people reading my ntries anyway, it's easier. 

Yeah, i'm still alive.
On the 16th i had a surgery. It went well, so now i just have to wait till its healed up completly and do then some physiotherapy and it'll be fine. Hopefully.  Geez, even though i try convince myself that the chances are low that it won't heal correctly (like my left hand after another surgery) i'm still a doomsayer. I'm scared like hell, that i won't be able to use my Hand like before in the end. So i'm trying to move my fingers as much as posible, since i'm panicing at the thought that it won't heal correctly if i don't move them enough for the senews.


So yesterday

1. Go to www.flickr.com
2. Type in your answer to the question in the "search" box
3. Use only the first page
4. Copy the html and paste for the answer.

I got finally an appointed day for my surgery (splitting of a sinew). i don't want to go there... its such a long time afterwards, where i won't be able to draw... T_T *wailes*

besides that i'm thinking about opening commissions (after my  hand healed though). i'm in the need of money, so yeah... who knows, maybe there really are people out there, which would pay for pics i've drawn LOL
ahaha i wonder if i'm able to get the money together before the prices for tattoos start to hike again... *peers at the piercing-studios*

since i'm thinking of getting sasukes cursed seal, i'm still chewing over the design. i'm not sure if i should take the seal only.. or with the seal of kakashi around it.. mhh... *scratches her chin* without it it would be smaller... though...
what do you think which one looks better? D=

Wow... my last post was like... 4months ago *stares* 
oh my... i don't know where i should start now...

Uhm.. i'm in a hospital since 01/30/08 and its rather busy there. i've got a hella lot of things to do there. its rather exhausting, most of the time i run around with headache. but the people there are really nice (though there are a few i don't like at all). i didn't make much progress in therapy... so i need to go to hospital a second time in a few months. heh... i don't really want to break my head over *that* now. i'm glad that i'm able to go back home at the 10th april =)

even though some parts of my therapy didn't work out very well, i'm still glad that i had to go there. over all the weeks i slowly started to change some things i wanted to change since...   years now. i never was a person which really dared to do something 'abnormal', i never dared to dress in some outfits i already have in my wardrobe...
now, after getting coaxed to use a hair strightener  und letting someone pluck my eyebrows (somehow i'm just to dumb for doing it completly alone. it looks mostly horrbile lol) i feel kinda different. since everyone is accepting me its much more easier to experiment with outfits. yeah.. and on thursday i finally dared to go to a piercing studio, and got an piercing on my eyebrow. i ever wanted to get one... but every time i just chickened out. i'm like.. uber-happy that i finally did it =D

Ahaha.. well i thought i should write all the fics down i'm reading or which i liked to read some time ago.. since i'm always searching for fics i started to read and afterwards forgot their names... *cough*

One Shots
Team Seven   by FastForward
Choosing Who by gelfling8604
Corrupted by ElfieRae

Finished Ones
The Sound of Dreams by Zrina
Lost in Translation by Rasengan22 ♥ ♥ ♥
No such thing as heroes by Rasengan22
Talk to me by Rasengan22 ♥ ♥ ♥
The Nerd by animehead
Naruto by FastForward
Broken by arora (lol i really loved the story.. at least till the one to last chapter. lol the last one.. isn't really my type of.. er.. storythingy)

Ongoing Ones i'm reading atm
Kiss Me Deadly by Aweshum
What Would Jesus Do by heythatsmybike
In Your Eyes by Nao_Angel
Perks by animehead
Team Dynamics by animeaddict666
Dusk Till Dawn by tsukiyue

I'm finally back online :)
Well.. i should normally continues to draw on my promised pics... and well... start to answer all my comments on y-gal.. and write some by myself -sigh- but well.. smehow i just can't get my sorry ass to do that right now. well.. funny.. all the time i missed just *that* and well.. writing rpgs. but now i just don't feel like it anymore.

i just feel tired and... well.. somehow empty. i guess its just because of the situation i'm in at the moment. there are a lot ... well 'problems'. the most of them are caused by my dad which is starting to do shit now, that we moved away from him and my hometown. besides that i just don't feel good at all. i guess its caused by my .. illness that i've got a lot of break downs the last weeks.
okay.. i have to say the break downs on themself aren't that bad.. till now i managed to go to the bathroom and lock myself in as soon as i started to lose control again. i'm really glad that i only get them n the nights, so that my sis and my mother don't notice it.
so yeah.. the only thing which really bothers me about them.. is that i feel tired all the time... and the headache xP   but i gues, i'll survive that as well. there are much worse things which could happen to someone :)

so yeah.. i'm sory for all the people i make to wait, just because i'm to lazy and to tired to work on anything at all...

mh.. well i guess thats enough for this entry.. but i'll write another one the following hours/days

# well i doubt that someone even does read this entry.. but just in case, someone does:
ahaha.. thx for reading, and hell, i'm not 'sad' i don' need people which tell me that they feel with me or such things. it isn't that big, and there are a lot of people out there which got it a lot worse and get depressed and all that shit.

geez.. i'm stupid. lol.. i'm bored like hell... but i just don't feel like answering my e-mails, or writing comments on y-gal. iiek. i don't even want to think about all the comments ishould write there...  since i waited far to long... i need to write atm 34 ..... 34 GAH.. . so damn troublesome D=.. . so yeah.. now i'm here and write a stupid journal so that i don't have to think about answering them 'cause i'm so bored.

lol besides that i wanted to tell that i'm moving at the 17.th... so i don't know when i'll be able to get back into the net after that... ... i dun wanna DX

well, actually every night i'm bored like hell. since i'm awake rather long (since i can't sleep well) there isn't much for me to do.. so i'm searching for fanfictions! :) i'm rather picky if its about reading fics, since i don't like every writing style.. and not every kind of .. well storyline.  but i would be really happy if there were some nice fanfic suggestions for naruto fanfics. i prefer the pairing sasu/naru (aka both as seme... i don't like narusasu or sasunaru that much alone. since i can't see one of them as typical 'bottom'). uh and fics where they kick each others ass the whole time are rather amusing.. and not too ooc ... ugh.. er.. i guess thats all.  
uh it would get some plus-points if its a fic containing kyuubinaru/csasu *ish a sucker for their beastforms and fightsex*

mh..  if i'm already asking for fanfics.. i'm asking for german ones as well. though the german ones don't need yaoi/s-ai (but please.. no sasusaku/sasuhina/narusaku/naruhina urgh .. but one without romance. a pure friendship fic would be ok) that much, as long as there are many fight szenes. and yeah it needs a good writing style :)

uh.. since i'm not writing that much here.. i think i should put some of my wips of my (still rather ugly) pics here.. to show on what i'm working atm :)

maybe i'll post here sometimes a short entry, but for the biggest part i'm only here on lj for stalking some nice ff-autors ;)

uh if someone likes my avatars.. feel free to take them, though don't forget to credit me. yeah. thats all xP